Big News!

We have decided to pursue adoption.

We have submitted our application through Bethany Christian Services and have been initially approved.

This, we hear is a very long and emotional process. Everything is out of our control and in the control of the agency and the birth mom.

We feel this is God's design and plan for our family. You may remember a few months ago I wrote about the trouble I had getting off my depression medication, how it didn't go well, and that we were exploring options for adding to our family.

I felt clear direction from the Lord to adopt. Daniel and I spent many nights and days discussing this and after reading several books and praying we both felt it was time. We went to an adoption information meeting and I knew then that this was our destiny.

Daniel and I have decided that we would like to adopt a baby girl. We've always wanted a girl, though Brayden is a Godsend and we wouldn't have it any other way. We'd love to add a girl to the family and for Brayden to be a big brother. 

If you really want to know, I still have days I struggle seeing pregnant mothers, mostly those I don't know. If I see a pregnant person out and about I may feel jealousy or start coming up with those Why questions to God (mainly Why not me). I have to catch myself and take those thought captive or they can get consuming.

I also struggle sometimes seeing tiny babies with moms. I long to hold a baby of our own in my arms again and go through all the milestones we went through with Brayden. I know that the girl baby we adopt will add even more joy and love to the family we already have.

I love the idea of Brayden being a big brother. I pray he is a strong and loving influence on the baby girl we have yet to adopt.

I fully believe God has already picked out this baby girl and it's his design that we take this path to adopting.

We know it won't be easy. I've already written about the spiritual warfare we've experienced even just making the decision or even going to the informational meeting. I know the devil wants nothing more than to stop God's plan. But we are strong in our prayer that this is the way our family will grow for now and so we are moving ahead.

Next step in this process is going through a 2 day training Fredericksburg (about an hour away from our home) and a long and invasive home study. I hear the interviews are long and they ask many questions about your current and former life including your childhood. We all have skeletons in our closet. It's just a matter of how much would deter one from adopting. I didn't have the easiest childhood and I'm prepared to be open and honest about that. My dad wasn't physically abusive but there was a lot of yelling and unkind words said. I shed a lot of tears while I grew up. 

We aren't raising Brayden in the same way that I was raised and I'm thankful for that. We are showing him discipline in love and lots of care and nurturing.

Anyways, just wanted to share the exciting news that we have indeed started the adoption process and I will be updating you as we go along. This will be a long journey. The agency has told us that the average wait time for a baby adoption is 23 months. It could be more for us since we've specified a few things, one being that we'd like to adopt a girl. And, the agency shared that birth moms are tending to choose couples that our infertile over couples that already have a child.

Would you join me in prayer for this process? Pray that God will lead us through and during the uncertain times that we cling to him and his promise that he will never leave us nor forsake us?

Have you ever though about adopting? Do you know anyone who has a successful adoption story?