Look for the Blessing

Glancing at an email from Dr. Amen this morning stirred my thinking.

Do you feel weary or depressed? Are you wondering how you can find joy in your current state?

Please allow me to back up a little and offer some context.

I am not someone who has escaped sadness or depression. In fact, for many years I struggled to understand my depression partially stemmed from lack of healing. For example, I needed to walk through emotional healing from PTSD and a traumatic childhood that left me reeling with anxiety. The journey of healing has not been an easy road, but certainly a worthwhile one! The sadness I experienced was also a mix of my genetics because I believe we are embodied souls compromising body, soul, and spirit. All three parts have to be working in conjunction to be healthy! Ultimately, we can’t be wise spiritually but neglect our physical health and expect to live a joy filled life.

As an outcome of walking the road of healing, I would like to pay it forward to instill hope for you or loved ones who are struggling.

Please trust me when I say this… God is bigger than our worst memories. God is bigger than the worst evil done to you. I promise you this. For example, the line “No scheme of man can ever pluck us from God’s hands,” is a powerful reminder located in the famous hymn “In Christ Alone.”

Unfortunately, there is terrible evil in the world and all types of abuse prevalent. I was a product of a childhood marred by that chaos. Please know I am writing from a place of empathy and forgiveness. I had to learn to pre-decide to forgive. No darkness, no evil, and no power of hell can overpower the light of the world which is found in Jesus.

The light shines in the darkness and darkness has not overcome it. —John 1:5

If you have been a Christ follower long enough, you will experience being misinterpreted, misquoted, and misunderstood. In other words, people will eventually assume ill of you, your heart, or your intentions as a follow of Jesus. Let them. I am telling you this for strength in your journey! More often that not, someone’s wrong assumptions are due to their own issues, their own trauma, their own parts of their souls that need healing.

Sister, it is not our job to fix other people.

Pray for others in their dysfunction and unkindness. Leave it to God. We are not anyone’s savior. The savior is Jesus and each person will ultimately answer to our Creator.

Further, let us please remember to be kind to those people who are hurting too. Hurt people hurt other people.

Be kind even if they are not being kind in return.

In other words, do not let others steal your joy!

If you belong in Christ and the Holy Spirit dwells in you, we should have joy evident in our lives!

Those without joy, even the smallest spec, are without God.

We call this in the christian community contentment. I have heard it described as a low grade joy. Ultimately, you will have contentment as a Christ follower as Paul described in various books throughout the New Testament. In Romans, Paul writes:

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. —Romans 15:13

Let’s return to the point of finding joy. Gratitude.

Here are some tips to help you along your journey. While these tips won’t fix your pain, they will help you continue putting one foot in front of the other!

Friend, trust that a new day will come when full shalom, full peace, full healing, full perfection of how the world could have been (but is not) will be restored.

Take a Walk

There is an amazing feeling of fresh air when we walk. Make sure you breathe fresh air into your lungs.

I recognize how easy it can be to make excuses… we might say, “it is frigid or I am burning up!”

I kindly ask that you either bundle up as best you can and go outside for ten minutes or find breathable clothes in the hot summer. I promise you will not freeze on a ten minute walk in winter and that you will not melt on a hot ten minute walk in summer. Ultimately, you will realize after ten minutes that you can walk for another five, another ten, or perhaps more. Sometimes when you are feeling blue, taking the first step outside is the hardest part.

Breathe Deeply

There is a reason people meditate and take deep breaths.

In fact, there is an entire industry who makes money marketing various sources of meditation and breathing exercises.

Breathing is essential for oxygen to our brains and for our bodies to function. Breathing is also essential to calm our nervous system.

Similarly, there is a cute book for kids for breathing ideas that my kiddo loves.

Breathe like a Bear has a bear holding a cup of hot chocolate that is beyond adorable and Brayden’s current favorite!

Call a Friend

This tip is assuming you have at least one friend in your life you can trust to be vulnerable with.

I pray this is the case for you! I continue to learn the precious gift of a good friend.

When you are walking through a hard season of life, a friend can often listen, be silly, or just spend time with you to let you know you are not alone.

Pray

You might be thinking, “Amanda, how come you did not put pray at the top of this list?” Good question. As a devoted Christ follower, my go to would be prayer first. I would like to offer something even more amazing… pray while you walk outside!

Many followers of Christ understand the power of a prayer walk. I have enjoyed several prayer walks at my in-laws farm.

I am living proof of the power of nature and prayer walks! In fact, Mike Donohey mentions the power of a prayer walk in his book, “Finding Gods Life for My Will - His Presence is the Plan.”

Not surprisingly, Mike admitted that he wasn’t able to pray well or for long periods of time. What changed for Mike? He began to pray as he walked in nature.

Ultimately, his prayer transformed his walk with the Lord.

Get A Counselor

There are so many studies that talk about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and its ability to help heal. In fact, CBT can be a powerful tool for processing thoughts for current situations.

However, I would like to stipulate that not all counselors are created the same. As someone who has spoken with a few, I pray you find the exact right counselor for your situation that carries years of wisdom and knowledge.

A great counselor will specialize in a particular area of help. In other words, some counselors are good for eating disorders or family relationships. Other counselors may have more training surrounding trauma, PTSD, and may be able to perform EMDR.

Whatever you do, don’t settle for a bad counselor!

A great counselor will not waste your time and a great counselor will set goals within the first two meetings that are SMART and attainable.

Likewise, a great counselor will be an expert at listening, synthesizing information, and offering solutions and ultimately hope.

Finally, understand there is balance of giving a counselor a chance and knowing when to cut ties.

Sometimes personalities do not mesh and other times the counselor may not be as qualified as you previously thought. Trust yourself sister. God is in you and you will not fall!

He will break open the scars to save those who cry out his name. The one the wind and waves obey is strong enough to save you. —Strong Enough to Save, Tenth Avenue North

May you feel peace and a relief.

—Xoxo