Your beautiful Story

Be hospitable to your own story…

Adam Young

I am thankful to be attending Redeeming Heartache Conference in just a few hours in Colorado.

While I had hoped to be at the gathering prior to the conference today, my body let me know that was not going to work out physically or mentally for me. In other words, when I reached my destination to rest… I let my body feel the weight of travel and expectations. I let myself rest… and that is ok. Part of healing and trauma work is listening to our bodies and allowing the rest to happen, occur, and not digesting guilt from the bodies need to fully rest.

As I rested… I am thankful I had tender moments over FaceTime with my husband, as we discussed the Redeeming Heartache book and I let the tears fall without shame.

Daniel and I both remarked on the poetic words of Redeeming Heartache, to understand my story including my family of origin, to understand the deep trauma (Capital T trauma) and how that has shaped my life. Ultimately, I am thankful for Redeeming Heartache authors, as well as Adam Young, because they provide words of deep, emotional, spiritual, and tenderness for my wounds.

I keep remarking that there is such beauty in words (but also can be such pain, anger, and darkness)… my husband and I were both struck by the beauty of Redeeming Heartache. I am learning daily that pain and joy can co-exist and that is OK. The idea that people are either all happy or all sad is not how God wired our brains, especially as people who grieve and still hold the hope of Christ.

Specifically, when talking about the origination of wounds and how they can manifest in the body (often unknowingly)… I found this quote insightful.

“Because the feeling of betrayal is so painful, the instruction of a child is to deny the betrayal, metabolize it, and construct a world where he doesn’t have to feel the anguish. An orphan is committed to a way of understanding his story that is devoid of more painful, terrifying parts that the young self can’t integrate. Deflecting trauma is the way he survives, but as an adult, the harm he refuses to face relegates him to a life of dogmatic commitment to a way of being that has kept him safe but bound.”

Redeeming Heartache, pg. 62

Redeeming Heartache framework for understanding trauma and why the body feels unsafe is important for someone doing the work of uncovering wounds. I believe, as the authors state, that identifying the wounds and understanding the pain, will lend itself to embracing our calling.

As I continue to learn via Wheaton’s Evangelism and Leadership program, the goal is to restore shalom. That was actually a major point of my first class via the Billy Graham Center - understanding the deeper story of the gospel and shalom.

Similarly, in accordance with understanding my story, wounds, and moving towards healing -the authors of Redeeming Heartache assert that the resurrection of Christ will help us, “Move beyond despair and powerlessness, and into anticipation and praise.”

I hope to be able to share more along this journey of healing… the joys and the pain and how they intersect in my life and yours.

Xoxo